Dared Belong

I've been in a bad mood most of the evening, mostly because of a dumb mistake that anyone could make. Still, I couldn't shake it for a while. Hell, I get more pissed at myself than anyone else. The last few days have been consumed with useless anxiety over work and whatever else is rattling in my head for no reason I can figure out. I should be in bed. I can't go to bed at a decent time to save my life lately. I've got to get up in eight hours and pretend to be healthy and well-adjusted. It's just part of the routine. I keep doing it because if I don't, I don't feel right, even if I'm so damned tired all the time anyway.

I need to write about this sometime. Someday. I ought to break out of this strange funk I've found myself in. I'm oscillating between a lot of different feelings, and none of them want to gel into anything cohesive. Things are fairly okay. I just don't have the words to describe anything and do it justice. I'm not sure what I'm justifying these days. I want you to see what I see, but I don't know. I can't find the words right now.

So I'm just going to post this and go to bed, I guess. Yeah.